Bitch food [bittsfuud]


To endure a tougher trek it’s essential for me to be under the influence of either caffeine, sugar, or wrath. As a caffeine overload in the midst of forest may lead to unwanted complications (I don’t feel the need to draw you guys a picture here) and Julien is generally a nice person that cause little or no wrath – sugar is the winner candidate.

Whenever I:

Get very quiet (like, scary quiet)

Start swearing


Yelling at total strangers passing by

Cursing all New Zealand treks and the creator of this planet…

…Julien usually pops a piece of Toblerone in my mouth and I go from monster to princess in a minute. Julien thinks it’s scary and says I’m like a Gremlin. I agree that I am – when they are cute, fluffy and adorable. This is perfectly clear and obvious to anyone that has ever met me.


Julien thinks I am more like the latter  kind of gremlin, (the not so fluffy and cute one with sharp teeth and monster face)  so he built me this chocolate-trekking-motivator in hope of peaceful and serene future treks. We call it the bitch food distributor.

Even if we don’t agree on, per say, everything, he is pretty alright this boyfriend.


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